Flirting With Disaster
by 1004-Angel
Summary: Adrien finds himself in deep trouble when Chloe discovers his secret double life as Chat Noir. Now he has no choice but to date her if he wants to keep his identity secret from the world...
1. Chapter 1

**I know, stop staring at me like that. I know I just posted another story a couple weeks ago. And haven't updated it. But I can't stop the plot bunnies. It ain't happening.**

 **Winter break is around the corner and once that's over, more regular updates, I promise. I want to get my feet wet in this premise and see how people like it.**

 **Once you get pulled into the miraculous world of Ladybug and Chat Noir… there ain't no going back. Especially when you start shipping Adrinette/LadyNoir, and any combination thereof. Then you're done for. Adrinette/LadyNoir trash. Such trash.**

 **I haven't decided if this is a reveal fic yet, but with what I have in mind I think that's where it will end up. But I'm not putting the cart before the horse; I'm just gauging reader interest right now.**

Miraculous Ladybug – Flirting With Disaster

Plot: Adrien finds himself in deep trouble when Chloe discovers his secret double life as Chat Noir. Now he has no choice but to date her if he wants to keep his identity secret from the world...

Chapter 1

It was a rare moment in Adrien's life when he could fully enjoy a vacation. His modeling gig, schoolwork, and saving the world really didn't leave much time for tomfoolery. But this was different. His father had taken Natalie with him abroad. There was no one to say _no,_ and no one shoving stupid schedules into his face. Adrien was determined to spend this one Saturday completely devoted to himself. And that meant running across the rooftops at incredible speeds, black suit standing out starkly against the bright Paris sky. From behind the mask, Char Noir's bright green eyes scanned the roaming people below, grinning to himself as he imagined all those ordinary people down there living their ordinary lives, and only wishing they could be as free as this alley cat.

Chat Noir slowed to a stop, standing just so that he had a perfect view of the Siene, the waters glimmering in the bright morning sunlight. He closed his eyes and breathed deeply, tasting the sweetness of the air on his tongue, much more crisp and alive than the dull, quiet atmosphere that surrounded the Agreste Mansion. This was probably Chat's favorite spot in the entire city. Since acquiring his alter ego, Adrien had found himself drawn to high places, finding that he enjoyed looking out, being above, and the feeling of being completely invulnerable. Plagg explained to him that his sudden cat-like tendencies came with the territory of Chat Noir's existence now completely embedded into Adrien's being. And the young blond didn't mind in the least.

"I thought I'd find you here," a cheerful voice said, and Chat Noir's heart leapt at the sound of his Lady's voice. He glanced over his shoulder, a smile widening across his handsome features as he beheld his partner in crime fighting, Ladybug. Her tightly fitting red and black polka-dotted uniform hugged her lithe frame, blue eyes smiling at him from behind the mask. There were times Chat wished he could take off that mask, profess his love to the girl underneath, and kiss her.

"You look exceptionally beautiful today, My Lady," he said flirtatiously, taking her hand in his and pressing her knuckles against his lips in a chaste kiss. He didn't lie... Something about Ladybug seemed much more bright than usual, and it suited her well.

"Not so bad yourself," Ladybug said dismissively, a smile of her own appearing on her face as she gazed out across the city. Chat looked around at her, and though he didn't care to admit it, his heart exploded with happiness at her dismissive compliment. Any compliment from the love of his life would send him over the moon.

"You're here early," Chat commented as Ladybug slid into a sitting position next to him.

"Didn't have anything else to do," she replied. "Hawkmoth is pretty quiet today."

"For once," Chat Noir agreed, settling down next to her. He leaned back on the palms of his hands, painfully aware of how close their fingers were. He resisted the urge to touch them.

Chat Noir had accepted long ago that he was in love with Ladybug. It hadn't even come as a surprise to him; it was just one moment he saw her fighting, a look of determination on her face that it just clicked in his head and his heart. Even with the mask on he could tell that whoever her regular self was beautiful, but her heart of gold was even more attractive.

He wanted so much to know who she was. What she did (besides crime-fighting), her hobbies (besides crime-fighting), her dreams and passions (besides crime-fighting). But, and Chat Noir was loathe to admit it, he wanted to know if she had someone already by her side. But she wasn't ready to tell him, and he respected that. He probably hadn't considered what her reaction would be once he reverted back to his normal self… he was kind of famous after all, even without the black suit and cat ears.

He had hints here and there to her identity, but those hints only made him feel like he knew absolutely nothing about her, despite seeing her almost every day to fight crime. The blog Alya had made for Ladybug was his primary source, but he didn't want to put all his eggs into one basket. So far he had gathered that she was about his age, athletic, and smart. But it seemed like there were so many high school girls out there with short dark hair and blue eyes. But Adrien had a feeling that if he ever saw her, he would just _know._

The black cat was torn from his reverie when a scream cut through the air, followed soon by mighty crashes. The crime-fighting duo exchanged knowing looks, standing and racing toward the sound. They didn't go far before spotting the akuma-tized villain standing on top of a building across the street, which had somehow become overgrown with bushes, small trees, and other vegetation. He was dressed in a dark brown latex suit, dark green gloves and boots covered his hands and feet. Atop his head was what appeared to be a head of broccoli, a particular vegetable that Chat hated. The man's face was half-obscured by a black mask. In his hand was what looked like a trowel, which he pointed menacingly at the people in the street below.

"Right," Chat Noir said, pulling out his baton. "Where do you think the akuma is?"

"My guess?" Ladybug said, whipping out her yoyo. "In the trowel."

"I am Treevil!" The man called triumphantly, brandishing his trowel. From its tip burst a green light, and in the streets below, a businessman was suddenly thrust into the sky as a tree exploded from the concrete, entangling the man in its branches. Ladybug launched her yoyo through the air, wrapping it around the thickest branch. She leaped down toward the trapped man as Chat Noir glared across the street at Treevil.

"What did you do!?" The black cat demanded, brandishing his baton threatingly.

"Ah, Chat Noir!" Treevil grinned furiously. "Construction has reduced nature to nothing! Now watch as nature takes its revenge!" He brandished the trowel in his direction, and Chat Noir suddenly found himself unable to move from where he stood. Thick roots had sprung from the tiles and wrapped themselves all the way up to his thigh, rooting him into place, literally. He hissed angrily, pulling uselessly at the roots but it was to no avail. They continued to grow around his body until he couldn't even move to activate his Cataclysm.

"Uh… Ladybug? A little help?"

Ladybug looked up and noticed her partner's predicament, a determined grimace appearing on her face. She assured the man in the tree he would be free soon, and returned to Chat's side.

"I actually sympathize with this guy," she muttered, yanking, unsuccessfully, at the tree roots that bound Chat Noir.

"Really?"

She nodded. "Yeah. We cut down trees to make room for buildings, and displace a lot of animals from their homes. Eventually there won't be anything left."

"Doesn't give a nature-obsessed guy the right to hurt anyone," Chat Noir argued.

As they spoke, more trees and vegetation sprouted all across Paris, woodland creatures ran wild on the streets, and Treevil had moved toward the Eiffel Tower, which had suddenly transformed into an enormous oak tree, towering high above the city with its roots stretching down every path.

The roots binding Chat finally gave way, and the duo leapt into action, flying across the rooftops in the direction of the Eiffel Tower. Treevil came at them with everything he had, launching vines to strangle them or sharpened roots to impale them. Chat dodged the onslaught with a catlike grace, finally reaching the base of the tower, Ladybug not far behind.

"We're back by _poplar_ demand," Chat snickered, using his baton to beat away vines. "What's the plan?"

"First, stop with the puns."

"This guy is really driving a splinter into our relationship."

Ladybug glared at him, and Chat Noir laughed in spite of the situation.

"We need to get up to the top of the tower," Ladybug said, focusing back on the task as she used her yo-yo to crush a root that was about to impale her partner from behind. "Get the trowel."

"The root of the problem."

Ladybug groaned. With every passing moment, Paris became more and more overrun with plant life. If they didn't do something soon, the entire city would be a forest.

"Cover me." Ladybug threw her compact into the air. _"Lucky Charm!"_ A flash of red light, and an extension cord fell into the girl's arms. "What the heck do I do with this?"

"Better think of something fast," Chat winced as a vine yanked painfully on his ankle before he managed to beat it back. "I'm not sure how much more of this I can take."

Luckily, his partner was, in fact, a fast thinker. "Get the trowel!" She demanded before fighting her way across the street, where a moving ice cream wagon was parked outside a set of apartments.

Chat Noir didn't need telling twice. With a yell, he sheathed his baton and began to scale the side of the tall tower, dropping to all fours to gain speed. The bark that had grown over the landmark was rough under his gloved hands, but the branches made it easier to climb. In no time, Chat was perched on one of the largest branches, Treevil standing just above him. Luckily, the villain hadn't spotted him yet. Chat suspected that wouldn't be the case in about two seconds.

" _Cataclysm!"_

The evil botanist barely had time to react before the thick branch beneath him suddenly began to crumble away thanks to Chat Noir's destructive power. From there it was easy for the hero to overpower the akumatized man as he tumbled down, yanking the trowel from his grasp as he passed. "I'll take that, thank you." The cataclysm wasn't enough to destroy the entire tree, so Chat hoped his partner had taken care of whatever she'd planned to do.

His question was answered as he dropped back down to ground level and safely lowered the unconscious Treevil to the ground. The roots and vines that had been attacking them were now frozen completely, coated in what looked like vanilla ice cream. Ladybug stood to one side, the pipe to an ice cream dispenser still in her hand. She dropped it once she saw him, and ran over.

"Did you get it?"

Chat grinned, whipping out the trowel with a flourish. "My Lady," he said, and offered it to her. "How did you know to freeze the vines?"

"Are you implying I don't pay attention in biology?"

"That was _amazing,_ Chat Noir!" a high-pitched voice screeched, and Chat flinched. Ladybug merely groaned; both of them could recognize that voice anywhere.

Chat Noir looked around, and sure enough the mayor's daughter Chloe Burguois was running towards him, an elated look on her face. She looped her arm around his, and it took all he had not to yank himself away. He'd had to deal with Chloe before; he remembered a specific instance where he'd been roped into doing her physics homework. And while Physics was Adrien's favorite subject, it hadn't exactly been the loveliest of experiences. Then again, it wasn't a pleasant idea to have to deal with Chloe not only as Adrien, but as Chat Noir, also.

"Chloe, was it?" Chat asked casually, carefully prying himself from the blonde girl's grasp.

"Oh, you remembered my name!" Chloe gushed.

 _How could I, we're in the same class._ But of course he couldn't tell her that.

Thankfully, Ladybug came to his rescue. "I need you to move away, Chloe," she told the preppy girl sternly. "It's still dangerous."

An audible beep resounded, and Chat looked down to notice the first paw print on his Miraculous blinked away. He only had a couple minutes before he transformed back into Adrien.

Chloe managed to take a selfie with Chat before Ladybug all but shoved her out of the way. With a grumble, Chloe stalked away, dragging her redheaded satellite behind her.

Once the akuma had been purified and the damage done to the city by Treevil magically removed, Ladybug grinned at Chat Noir, who smiled confidently back. " _Mission Complete,"_ they chanted, fist bumping happily.

Their happiness was short-lived however, as Chat's ring beeped again, leaving the superhero with only a few paw prints left before he transformed again. "I guess that's my cue," he said, keeping the disappointment from his tone. He'd hoped to spend more time with his Lady on his day off, but it seemed like that wasn't going to happen.

Ladybug raised her hand, a gentle farewell. "See you later, kitty!" she smiled.

"Wait a sec." Chat reached out and took Ladybug's forearm. She looked at him curiously, blinking those beautiful blue eyes up at him. " _Plant_ one on me before you go," he grinned cheekily with a wink.

Ladybug rolled her eyes, pressing a finger against his forehead and pushing him away. "Whoa, kitty kitty," she teased back. "I wish you _wood_ cut that out already."

Chat grinned stupidly at her own bad joke. "I'm wearing off on you."

"You wish!" With a laugh, Ladybug launched herself into the air and dashed away, her form disappearing among the buildings. Chat stared after her with a blissful sigh until he couldn't see her anymore, the warning beeping from his ring the only thing that made him high tail it out of there. He couldn't risk transforming back into Adrien in the middle of the street.

He ducked behind a sign, just barely managing to slip out of sight before a flash of green light enveloped his body, and he could feel the tight black suit melt away from his skin as the familiar feeling of his everyday clothes fell around his shoulders. His Miraculous ring faded from black to dull silver, and Adrien caught Plagg just before the small kwami crashed headfirst into the sign.

" _Cheese_ …." The tiny cat creature mumbled tiredly, rubbing his head against Adrien's fingers.

Adrien smiled, massaging Plagg's head with his thumb. "When we get home, I'll have a giant cheese buffet bro—"

" _Adrien!?"_

Adrien froze, a sense of dread suddenly overcoming him. He didn't like the sound of that voice, of surprise and tinged with fear. Slowly, the blonde boy turned on his heel to face Chloe, her jaw somewhere on the ground and her eyes round as saucers. She must have followed him after Ladybug had pushed her away. But what pinged Adrien's radar, however, was the cell phone held aloft in her hands, a flashing red light indicating it was recording. And Adrien had a sinking feeling he knew exactly what had been recorded.

"Who's that?" Plagg asked wearily from Adrien's cupped hands, raising his head to stare at Chloe, who met the tiny cat's wide green eyes with her own blue ones.

"Chloe…" Adrien tried slowly, feeling the color drain from his face.

"Adrien, you're…."

"Chloe, calm down…"

" _You're Chat Noir!?"_

.o0o.

 **Please don't kill me.**

 **I know my plant puns are awful. Leaf me alone. I also suck at action scenes.**

 **I do my best to write long-ish chapters, so hopefully from here things will get longer. Let me know if you think this is worth continuing; like I said, gauging interest.**

 **Love this damn show.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you for the wonderful support, everyone! I'm doing my best on this end; all your lovely reviews give me motivation to keep writing, I couldn't do it without you.**

 **Fair warning, I suck at writing bitchy characters like Chloe.**

 **If you are interested you can follow me on tumblr at the-noble-idiot where I post Miraculous Ladybug, K-pop, and other goodies. #shamelessplugging**

The Story So Far:  
Chat Noir and Ladybug are spending a peaceful patrol together when a nature-loving akuma strikes. After defeating it, Chloe the Fangirl ruins the mood. After Ladybug departs, Chat Noir finds a safe place to transform back into Adrien, only to realize that Chloe recorded his transformation on her phone, and has now discovered his secret identity.

Chapter 2

Adrien's mind was blank. He'd never anticipated this kind of occurrence. He and Chloe stared wide-eyed at each other, Plagg still whining breathlessly in his cupped hands. Adrien's fight-or-flight response was kicking in, and the cat in him was tense, ready to flee the second Chloe even blinked.

Eventually, his childhood friend – acquaintance – regained control of herself, moving forward a step. "Adrien…?"

His legs moved on their own, and Adrien high-tailed it out of there, dropping Plagg into his jacket pocket. He could hear Chloe shouting behind him, possibly running after him, but he didn't turn back. Luckily the Eiffel Tower was in Adrien's backyard, and it only took a minute before the boy skidded to a halt outside the huge gates that opened to admit him.

"Chloe saw… Chloe _saw_..." the model panted as he slammed his bedroom door behind him, sliding to the floor in an exhausted heap. His head was swimming, already regretting his split-second decision to run. Chloe had a video of him transforming, why the heck had he left her there? That video could be a viral hit by now, and it wasn't like Ladybug was a hermit living in the middle of nowhere with no Internet access…

Adrien's head dropped into his hands, fighting back frustrated tears that stung his eyes. This sucked. The cat was out of the bag. He had been waiting, _anticipating_ the day that he and Ladybug decided to finally reveal themselves to one another, each entrusting the other with their most treasured secret. And now _Chloe_ of all people…

This was the worst-case scenario. He and Ladybug jumped through hoops to keep their identities secret, from the world and each other, and now all of those efforts were going to waste. His heart crawled up in his throat, an intense pressure rising behind his eyes. He would not cry. He had to be tough and figure this out.

Plagg wormed his way out of Adrien's pocket and immediately went to where the boy kept his stash of Camembert. Munching on it softly, the kwami said, "You okay?"

Adrien glanced upward. "I should tell Ladybug. Do you have enough energy for a phone call?"

Plagg swallowed the rest of the cheese, nodding silently. "Claws out." Once the transformation was over, Chat activated the audio call setting on his baton. After a couple buzzes, Ladybug picked up.

"Make it quick, Chat, my kwami doesn't have much energy."

"What's the code for an emergency?"

"What?"

"You know how in the movies where people are running around screaming in circle shouting 'Code Blue!' or 'Code Red!'? So what's the color for emergencies?" Chat's voice was thin, anxious, and unless he was mistaken, betrayed an undertone of fear. The superhero couldn't recall a time when his voice ever sounded like that, usually opting for a suave and flirtatious dynamic. He closed his eyes and concentrated.

Ladybug's voice was curious. "Code Red, isn't it?"

"Then we have a Code Red. _Serious_ Code Red. Like, _my life is ruined_ Code Red."

"Chat, calm down, breathe, tell me what happened."

He took a few shaky breaths. "I've been found out."

"What?"

"I got caught transforming back to my real self," Chat's voice dropped to a whisper, and he spoke faster with every moment. "I'm not sure what's going to happen… but if it goes public… please don't freak out."

Ladybug was silent on the other end of the line. The only indication she was still there was a sharp intake of breath, and he could practically sense her mind whirling as she processed the sudden development. "Ladybug?"

"Oh… oh…." Ladybug seemed to realize she hadn't spoken and struggled to find words. "What are you going to do about it? You know that if Hawkmoth discovers your identity, he'll send akumas directly to you without rest."

"I know, I know, I'm working on it," he said anxiously. "I just wanted to tell you to be prepared in case… things fall through."

"Thanks…"

"But…" Chat hesitated. "If you want me to tell you right now… who I am, I mean… all you have to do is ask." He knew it was a long shot. Ladybug had made it clear she did not care at all to know the person behind his mask, and he respected that. But Chat Noir was human (cat eyes and tail notwithstanding) and had human emotions and desires. He wanted to be the first person to tell her; she shouldn't have to find out his identity by some shaky video uploaded on YouTube.

Chat had imagined what it would be like, when they finally revealed their identities to one another. He would look at her for a moment, taking in her normal, beautiful self, and wrapping her in a hug. She would be a little surprised to know that world-renowned fashion designer Gabriel Agreste's model son was gallivanting across Paris in a skin-tight black suit, but she would accept it, and their relationship would grow to new heights. His vision was shattered before his eyes.

Ladybug hesitated for a moment. "My transformation's wearing out, Chat, I have to go… Call me when you've worked things out." She skillfully avoided answering directly, but Chat still took it as a rejection of his identity. He couldn't help but feel a little dejected.

"Y-yeah…" Chat fumbled over his words, another first for him, before hanging up on her. He felt bad for leaving Ladybug hanging like that, but at that moment he really had no idea what to do. He curled up tighter into a ball and rested his forehead against his knees, releasing his transformation. He could hear Plagg groan wearily, but the teenage superhero was too stressed to acknowledge.

"Has this ever happened before? Being found out?" Adrien asked the kwami, his voice muffled.

"Once or twice," Plagg said carefully after moments of deliberation. He floated down to rest on Adrien's shoulder.

"What happened?"

Adrien could practically sense Plagg's indecision about whether or not to tell him. Eventually, he said, "Depends."

"Depends on what?"

"On the person. Chat Noir _and_ the unlucky sap who found out."

"Well that's helpful."

A wild knocking echoing through the room interrupted Plagg's retort. "Adrien!"

Chloe's voice. A shiver rocketed down Adrien's spine, and he shot up into a standing position, staring the door down as if it had personally outed his secret. He barely had time to regret not locking it when the blonde haired girl threw it open, hands on her hips and piercing blue eyes drilling holes straight through his skull.

They stood there for a split second, staring each other down. Adrien could practically see her eyes roaming his body, mentally dressing him up as his alter ego as if she needed one last piece of the puzzle to finally accept the truth. Finally, Chloe's demeanor changed as quickly as blinking. In a second she was smiling warmly, her arms open and fingers wiggling in an open invitation to embrace him, her eyes sparkling mischievously. "Adrien, hi!"

Plagg poked his head from over his human's shoulder from where he'd taken cover, looking over at the mayor's daughter skeptically. "Listen, you. I don't know what you think you saw, but…"

"Oooo, it's so cute! Look at his little ears!" Chloe zeroed in on Plagg, who let out a noise like he was coughing up a fur ball.

" _CUTE?"_

"Adrien, why'd you run?" Chloe returned her attention to the unmasked superhero, wrapping an affectionate hand around his wrist to keep him from bolting. She spoke in a voice that he knew well: the voice she used when she wanted something and would do anything to get it. "I know you're pretty freaked out that I discovered your secret but I won't tell."

Adrien's eyes narrowed, every fiber of his being screaming at him to call her bluff. Yet some part of him wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt… the stupid part probably. "Really?"

"Really really," Chloe cooed, her hands moving from his wrist and up his arm. Adrien resisted the urge to pull away. Don't piss off the girl who can ruin your life with the press of a button. "Would I ever lie to you? I'm so offended that you think so little of me!"

"What about what's on your phone?"

Chloe's smile didn't falter. Without releasing her grip on him, she pulled out her phone and with a few taps of her thumb, displayed the video.

" _Chloe, wait up!"_

" _You're too slow, Sabrina!"_

It began moments after Ladybug purified the akuma. The shaky video captured Chat Noir ducking out of sight behind the display sign, barely managing to capture the last few seconds of green light as the last of Chat's black suit fell away into jeans and T-shirt.

" _Adrien?"_

The current Adrien winced as he saw the shocked expression on his video-self's face, undeniably his, looking undeniably guilty. Incriminating video evidence. Even the top of Plagg's head was visible in his hands. Adrien had hoped that whatever footage Chloe had gotten would have been blurred; after all, the girl was no videographer like Nino.

"You mean this?" Chloe shook the device in her hand. "It's insurance."

Adrien made a grab for it, but Chloe was too quick and pulled it out of his reach. "Delete it, Chloe."

"Oh come on, you can trust me!"

He certainly didn't trust that grin on her face. "You don't know what you're dealing with. If that video gets out –" Adrien paused, not sure how to describe the consequences of outing his secret. How could he possibly explain Hawkmoth and the entire _purpose_ of his being Chat Noir to the girl who had been the cause of most of their akumatized classmates?

"You can trust me because now it's _my_ secret too! Which makes it _our secret."_ Chloe brought her lips close to his ear and whispered low, effectively freaking him out even more.

He pulled his arm away from her, stepping back. Luckily she didn't follow. "What do you want, Chloe?"

A grin almost on par with the most evil villains he'd faced crossed Chloe's lips. She pocketed her cell phone and patted it condescendingly. "You'll figure it out at school on Monday."

.o0o.

It was times like this Adrien wished that he had a friend who already knew his secret. This was a situation to confide in others with, for advice. As much as Nino meant to him, he wasn't sure if his friend could provide for him in this situation.

It was Monday morning. Chloe had left with a kiss against his cheek and an unconvincing promise to not let out his secret, blowing a kiss for good measure. She was his childhood friend, sort of, but how could he trust her? She was a girl; girls – _especially_ Chloe – can't keep secrets! (Except for Ladybug, but that doesn't count.) He could only hope that the blonde girl's dimness would work in his favor and she would have forgotten everything, but he wasn't holding his breath.

With Plagg still tucked safely into his shirt pocket, Adrien half-expected to be bombarded with both the paparazzi _and_ akumatized baddies the moment he opened the front door. No one waited for him, and for the first time in his life, he was glad to have a normal morning.

As usual, Natalie appeared at breakfast to present him with this schedule. As usual, he gathered up his bag and stepped out the door into the crisp morning air where his driver waited for him. And as usual, Nino greeted him outside the school with a cheerful wave.

"Hey, bro, what's up!" the dark-skinned boy clapped a hand on Adrien's shoulder, a cheerful smile on his face.

To the boys' right, Marinette and Alya walked by. Adrien caught the dark-haired girl glancing at him out of the corner of her eye, and she squeaked when he waved at her. Alya giggled and manually raised Marinette's hand to wave back. Marinette pulled her hand free and scurried up the remaining steps, Alya laughing good-naturedly as she followed.

"Hey, dude, what do you think about Alya?" Nino asked suddenly, and Adrien followed his friend's gaze after the girls.

"Alya?" he said. "She's cool." He wasn't about to admit to his friend that he followed her Ladyblog religiously.

"Cool?"

Adrien suddenly got a chill up his spine, and his instincts as Chat Noir kicked in. Grabbing Nino, he suddenly dove to the left, just barely dodging a large round disc that exploded against the concrete where he and Nino were standing a second before.

Adrien hovered protectively over his friend, who groaned and rubbed the back of his head. Across the street, a buff man in a solid red sleeveless suit was striding towards him, one hand held out to the side. The disc, which had lodged itself deep within the concrete, rattled from the rubble and returned to the man's hand. The newest villain laughed loudly, taking a stance that Adrien knew meant that he was about to throw his weapon again.

Just before he could, a flash of red, and the man's wrist was suddenly restrained by Ladybug's yo-yo string. His eyes followed the string to the roof of the school, where the scarlet superhero stood confidently, blue eyes blazing.

"Why don't you pick on someone your own size," she taunted, and proceeded to draw the akumatized man away from the school, skillfully dodging flying discs and ushering passersby to a safe distance.

After double-checking that Nino was safe, Adrien grit his teeth and took the school steps two at a time. It didn't take him long to find an empty classroom to transform, smiling as timid Adrien melted away into confident Chat Noir. He was about to leap out the window, when…

"Go get 'im, Adrien!"

Chat flinched, glancing over his shoulder to see Chloe in the doorway, a mischievous smile on her face and her fist pumping the air encouragingly.

"Uh huh," he grunted, whipping his tail in a display of annoyance before jumping fearlessly from the second story.

Chloe had kept his secret this long, a record for her, and yet his still didn't have any idea what she had in store for him. The day had barely begun, and already an even heavier sense of dread was overcoming him. It dominated his thoughts throughout the battle with the Strongman, an overweight frequent at a local gym who had been constantly criticized by other gym-goers, the main perpetrator being an upperclassman at the school, hence his attack there so early that morning.

He managed to subdue Strongman long enough for Ladybug to force the akuma from the shattered disc and purify it. The Healing Cure rushed through the city and pieced cars, concrete, and exploded windows back together again, leaving the victim in the grass with a confused look on his face.

Ladybug looked at Chat, obviously aware of how off his game he seemed today. He avoided her eyes, instead noting that he had already lost two paw prints on his Miraculous; Ladybug was already down to three.

"Have you figured anything out yet?"

Chat shook his head. "She hasn't given me her terms yet."

" _SHE?"_

Ladybug's tone was incredulous. If he wasn't mistaken, it sounded a little… _jealous?_ Or maybe that was just his heart wanting to believe that his love felt that particular way. He shook the thought from his mind. "Who was it?"

Chat grimaced. "I guess you have a right to know… it was Chloe. She followed me after you pushed her away, and caught my transformation on video."

Ladybug looked like she had swallowed bitter cough medicine, emitting a strange gurgling sound in her throat. Her fists clenched at her sides, and she opened her mouth to say something but was interrupted as both their Miraculous beeped another warning. Instead, she fought back whatever she was going to say and suggested, "Call me later and tell me how it went. Keep me updated at all times."

Chat nodded, and took off at a run as Ladybug threw her yo-yo and swung out of sight. Luckily, the battle hadn't taken them too far from the school, but he still barely managed to swing back into the (thankfully) still empty classroom before his transformation wore off. With a flash of green light, Adrien Agreste had returned, a disheartened expression warping his features as he stared at his exhausted kwami in his hands.

"That was _great,_ Adrien!"

The model's mood was no more encouraged when Chloe raced up to him. "What do you want?" he asked bitterly, digging a piece of cheese from his bag and feeding it to Plagg before slipping the kwami gently into his usual pocket.

"That's not important!" Chloe crooned, grabbing Adrien's discarded bag from the floor and placing it impatiently back on its owner's shoulder. "We have _class_ to get to!"

"Since when do you care about class?"

Adrien was ignored. Chloe looped her arm through his and pulled him out the door, the boy trailing behind in subtle protest. Adrien willed himself to not get on Chloe's bad side, appease her for as long as he could until he could get a hold of that video and delete it. Without video evidence, anything Chloe said would be taken with a grain of salt, and eventually rumors would die out.

Chloe strode confidently through the door to the classroom, Adrien stumbling to a stop next to her. Mrs. Bonnaire turned from writing on the board to stare at her two students sternly. Adrien's gaze flicked apologetically toward Nino, who was staring at him confusedly.

 _Where'd you go, dude?_ He mouthed.

 _Later,_ Adrien mouthed back.

"Chloe, Adrien!" Mrs. Bonnaire confronted the two, hands sternly on hips. "I expected this from you, Ms. Burguois, but Mr. Agreste, I am disappointed in you!"

Adrien's head bowed as he accepted his teacher's admonishment. He was definitely going to hear about this from his father, later.

"Oh don't worry, Mrs. Bonnaire," Chloe said sweetly, gripping Adrien's arm extra hard. "We were just taking our time before class." Her eyes turned to his, and Adrien suddenly got a bad feeling deep within his gut. "See, we're _dating_ now."

 **Now we've gotten to the meat of the matter, and things will be rocketing from here! Hope ya'll enjoyed! Check out my one-shot** _ **Please Leave a Message**_ **while you're waiting for the next chapter!**

 **Updates for my other stories are in the works, so if you're following them, chapters should be up in the next few days. Look forward to it!**


	3. Chapter 3

**I don't know why, but I have an image of Gabriel Agreste dressed up as Ladybug and I can't get it out of my head, help…**

 **On a different story of mine, a reviewer suggested I include an extremely brief summary of the story so far, since I tend to update sporadically and I don't want to throw you through the trouble of rereading everything.**

 **Hope you guys are having a miraculous week!**

The Story So Far:  
Chloe has discovered Adrien's secret double life as Chat Noir. Adrien isn't sure how to deal with the discovery, and turns to Ladybug for support. At school on Monday, another akuma attacks, and Chloe cheers Adrien on. Chat Noir tells Ladybug that Chloe was the one who discovered his secret. When he returns, Chloe pulls Adrien into the classroom and announces that they are dating.

Chapter 3

The classroom was deathly silent as the students tried to process what had just dropped from Chloe's mouth. Everyone knew that she _wanted_ to properly date the famous model, going so far as to sabotage the class short film in order to kiss him, but she had never before explicitly stated that she _was_ until that exact moment. Everyone, even Adrien himself, was trying all at once to figure out if she was joking or not.

Chloe smirked up at him, and Adrien realized that, in fact, she was _not_ joking. It was clear as day in her eyes: date me, or your secret's out. A pained expression flashed across his face; he was trapped. He didn't know what he had been expecting as payment for her silence, but he should have seen something like this coming. He looked back at the faces of his classmates, anywhere but Chloe's triumphant expression.

Nino's jaw had dropped somewhere on the floor, his eyes bugging from his head. The dark-skinned boy knew better than anyone how much Adrien didn't like Chloe, and his brain was probably short-circuiting at the news. Adrien's gaze moved to directly behind him, where Alya and Marinette sat. Alya's expression was shocked, but oddly she was casting worried glances over at her friend.

Marinette had been staring at Chloe when they had entered the classroom, an almost murderous expression on her face, calculating eyes narrowed as if she were trying to fire lasers from her eyes and burn Chloe to a crisp. At Chloe's announcement, however, she had gone pale as a ghost, her eyebrows furrowed and mouth curled into an open frown as she tried to process. Of the classroom, Marinette seemed the most disturbed by this news, the others simply exchanging doubtful glances or looking confusedly at him.

Chloe elbowed him in the side after a few seconds of silence passed. "Oh, uh…" Adrien coughed, already regretting the words out of his mouth. He plastered on one of the fake smiles he had mastered over years of practice. "Chloe's telling the truth."

For good measure, Chloe pressed her lips to his cheek, earning gasps from the room. While she had done this before, it hadn't bothered Adrien until now. His skin burned painfully where she touched him, and not the fun, sexy type of burn. He was walking on hot coals and just fell face-first.

From his peripheral, the blonde boy could see Nino almost fall out of his chair, and Alya moved to put her arm around Marinette who, unless he was mistaken, looked like she was trying not to cry. Even the teacher seemed surprised, used to the distant relationship shared between he and Chloe.

The silence remained, but this time it seemed utter surprise and disbelief rather than confusion. Adrien tried not to let it faze him, and continued to wear the mask of a happy teenage boy, underneath trying not to die.

"Oh, well, uh, congratulations," Mrs. Bonnaire said, regaining control of her classroom. "Please take your seats."

Adrien moved to take his usual spot next to Nino, but Chloe refused to relinquish her hold on his arm. She pulled him across the aisle, and evicted Sabrina from her chair. Sabrina probably couldn't decide whether or not to be excited for her "friend" or feel betrayed that she had been replaced with a boy. With a sad sigh, she sat next to Nino as Chloe pushed Adrien into Sabrina's old chair before taking her normal seat.

Adrien exchanged sorry glances with Nino, who was miming an order to text him later.

Adrien found it impossible to concentrate on the class that day. Chloe refused to release his arm and spent the hour whispering in his ear. The only thing to occupy his thoughts was Ladybug. He was a taken cat… pulled off the streets and house-trained. Tied down to the one person he had vowed never to acknowledge as anything more than a past acquaintance; Chloe had made it explicitly clear over their time growing up together that she would do no good for him, even if his father disagreed.

Ladybug… could he tell her the truth? He knew that she didn't see him as anymore than a trusted friend and partner, but somehow Adrien couldn't muster the resolve to confess to his love Chloe's price for his privacy. It would mean he was off the market. Even if Adrien was keen on dating Chloe (which he _wasn't_ ), he wasn't so low as to resort to cheating and lying. His guilty conscious was far too strong for that. So what would he tell her?

"Alright, read chapter eight by tomorrow, and complete the questions at the end of the chapter. Have a great day."

Mrs. Bonnaire dismissed her class for the day. Adrien barely had time to pack his bag before Chloe had him by the arm and dragged him from the class.

"Chloe, let go, I can walk on my own," Adrien protested.

"No way," Chloe huffed. "If you don't want me to let the cat out of the bag – Ooh~ did you see what I did there!? – then you have to do what _I_ say. And the first qualification of being my boyfriend is stop hanging out with those losers."

Adrien's gaze hardened. "Nino's not a loser."

Chloe stopped on the stairs leading down to the wide gym area, glaring up at him from the step below. "You are so much better than they are, Adrien, why can't you see that? Someone like you and me shouldn't even give those peasants the time of day."

" _Peasants?"_

Chloe either didn't seem to catch his indignant reaction to her choice of vocabulary, or she didn't care. Grabbing his hand, she made extra sure to entwine their fingers before taking off down the stairs again. For about the millionth time that day, Adrien cursed his traitorous bad luck.

Both Adrien's and Chloe's drivers were waiting for them outside the school. Chloe waved away hers and steered them towards the Gorilla, who eyed the new "couple" with what Adrien detected as surprise, skepticism, or a simple knowing. It was hard to tell with his stoic expression. "Adri-kins is taking me home today," Chloe told the Gorilla, tapping her foot expectantly.

Adrien had established with the Gorilla that he was capable of opening doors on his own, and insisted that he not be treated like the royalty he wasn't. Chloe was growing impatient, waiting for the Gorilla to open the door for her, so Adrien just sighed and grabbed the handle.

Chloe looked horrified that Adrien opened his own doors, but thankfully didn't raise a fuss about it. She climbed inside, still refusing to relinquish her grasp on her new beau. Adrien looked over his shoulder, mournfully watching as Nino and Alya exited the building with little Marinette trailing behind, all three of them watching him worriedly. Adrien gave a mournful wave before he was pulled inside the limo and the door shut. He grimaced at the metaphor, a door closing on the life he had fought his father so hard to obtain, now trapped in a one-sided relationship where he couldn't curse a cat without getting fur in his mouth.

As the limo pulled away from the curb, Chloe began rattling of her list of expectations for him as her boyfriend. Adrien leaned his elbow against the armrest and laid his cheek against his palm, blinking tiredly as he stared out the window at the passing city, not unused to unreasonable expectations thrust into his lap. The thought of more restrictions made him sick. Usually Chat Noir was his outlet from such things, but now, Chloe was tightening the new collar around his neck, and he was suffocating.

"I don't want you even _thinking_ about other girls," Chloe was saying, scrolling absentmindedly through her phone. "Especially not those tramps Marinette and Alya. They're beneath you."

Adrien's fist clenched, but he dared not object.

"And I expect to be taken out on dates at least twice a week." Chloe continued, twisted excitement bleeding through her obsessive tone.

"Providing that I don't have to do my job," Adrien sighed into his palm.

Chloe looked at him sharply through her eyelashes. "Job?"

Adrien met her gaze, just as sharply. "I'm still Cha…" his eyes flicked to where the Gorilla sat a couple feet away. "You seem to forget the _only_ reason I'm agreeing to this, Chloe. If duty calls, I have to go."

Chloe huffed. "In that case, you can't flirt with Ladybug. You're with _me,_ now. Other girls are completely off limits."

Adrien was not pleased with this development, but once again, could not object. He wasn't going to let her know just how deeply his feelings for Ladybug ran. It wasn't like she would be watching him 24/7, though he wouldn't put it past her to sneak a tracking and/or listening device into his pocket. He only had to deal with this for a little while, until he could delete the video and other copies she may have. Besides, who was she to try and reign in this alley cat? Those who tried to train cats could tell anyone it was a fool's errand.

Chloe idolized Ladybug, cosplayed as her, and had even shown off her merchandise to Adrien during a dinner meeting when their respective fathers discussed whatever adults discuss. Adrien couldn't help but wonder if his new "girlfriend" had ulterior motives breaking off the relationship between himself and Ladybug.

"Speaking of Ladybug," Chloe continued, her voice suddenly excited. "Who is she in real life? You have to know. We're best friends but I don't know why she won't tell me."

Adrien snorted through his nose. "I don't know who she is, and she doesn't know who I am. And she doesn't consider you a friend."

He tuned out whatever Chloe began ranting about and continued to watch the streets of Paris fly past the window, lost in his jumbled and emotionally strained thoughts. When the limo finally pulled up in front of Chloe's house, he made no move to escort her to the door. It was the little things he could do to express his displeasure. Maybe he could knock a few random things off her shelves for no reason? He'd found sadistic pleasure in that, recently. It was a great stress reliever. Absentmindedly, he wondered what objects on his shelves could be knocked to the floor without damage when he returned home.

Chloe, still miffed about his uncooperative manner in the Ladybug Identity Rant, eventually realized she wasn't going to get anything out of him, and pressed a kiss to his unresponsive cheek before throwing open the car door and storming up the steps. She wiggled her fingers at him in a sensual wave, and he dipped his own in polite acknowledgement before giving the Gorilla the okay to head home.

.o0o.

Patrol was quiet that night. Chat Noir roamed across the rooftops, bright green eyes scanning the darkness for any akuma activity, but his mind was elsewhere.

He had agreed to meet Ladybug at their normal spot above the Eiffel Tower observation deck at around midnight, but Adrien was restless, and ended up starting his patrol two hours early much to Plagg's chagrin. But the small kwami understood that his boy had a lot on his mind, and didn't complain too loudly. Chat had traveled his usual route at least three times by now, but however hard his mind tried to stay focused on his duty as Paris's hero, his thoughts kept slipping to Chloe and Ladybug.

What was he supposed to tell his partner? She had demanded the truth over their brief phone call earlier, and he knew that whatever lie he told her, she'd see right through it. Adrien – and through him, Chat – wasn't a good liar. But he also didn't want to tell her that he was being forced into an unhealthy relationship to keep his secret, because then she would worry about him, and he hated being the cause of her frown. It was something he had to deal with on his own, since it was _his_ secret and Chloe was _his_ classmate and… ugh, his girlfriend.

Chat couldn't put Ladybug through that, having her constantly worry about him. Though, he would admit, having her thinking about him all the time was one of his goals in his quest to make her fall for him. Though… he hadn't imagined her thinking about him like _this._ With a bound, Chat landed in a rolling crouch thirty minutes before their meeting time, keeping stock still on the edge of the observation deck. His form was still as a gargoyle; the only sign of life being the occasional flick of his tail or a dart of the eyes as his scanned the Parisian skyline.

"Chat?"

He nodded his head and stood to full height, hands relaxed on his hips. "Hi, Ladybug."

She came up to stand next to him, looking at her partner closely. Chat kept his face level and didn't meet her gaze. As much as it pained him, he wasn't going to risk the presence of a recording device and in turn incite Chloe's vengeance.

"What, no flirty banter today?" Ladybug asked teasingly, though he could detect a sadness in her tone.

Chat's eyes found interest in his silver-toed boots. He struggled to find words to say, but the only thing past his lips was the truth. After all his worrying, he still couldn't bring himself to lie to his Lady. "Other girls are off-limits," he muttered. "No flirting with Ladybug."

She cocked an eyebrow, clearly confused as to what her partner was getting at. "What are you talking about?"

Chat let out a sigh. "It's one of the conditions of keeping the secret. I'm not allowed to flirt with you anymore. Chat Noir is strictly business, now."

Ladybug was taken aback, literally stepping away from him as she noticed their sudden proximity. "Really?"

"That's not all," Chat winced. "I have to take her on dates. I can't hang out with my normal friends. If this is what being a boyfriend is like, I don't like it."

Ladybug choked. Chat looked over at her in concern, and was quick to notice that his partner had gone a paler shade, hands rising to her mouth in astonishment. "B-boyfriend?" she stuttered uncharacteristically.

"Yeah." Chat noticed the stutter but it didn't seem to register with him as he settled on the edge of the deck and let his feet hang over the precipice. Shoulders visibly slumped as he rested his chin in his propped hand and stared blankly into nothing. "If I don't want Chloe releasing my identity video, I have to date her."

His ears picked up the sound of a sharp inhale, and bright green eyes glanced at Ladybug. He started in surprise to see her reaction, picking his head up from its resting spot and shifting to get a better look. Gone was the cool, calm, and collected Ladybug. In her place was an uncharacteristic mess of a girl. She had stumbled a couple more steps backward, blue eyes widened considerably behind her mask. Hands trembled over an open mouth, though he could see she was trying to hide her obvious and over-the-top reaction. "B-boyfriend… you…" she said, almost subconsciously.

He inclined his head. This was almost… too reactive. He'd been expecting surprise, comfort, anger, but this… this was downright _shock,_ for lack of a better term. He didn't dislike it, and he admitted to himself that it was refreshing to see his Lady display a different side of her personality in his presence. "Are you okay?" he asked quietly.

She seemed to get a grip on herself and regained composure, releasing a deep, calming breath and settling down next to him. "I should be asking you that," she said, voice still shaking slightly but whether from anger or surprise, Chat couldn't tell. "Dating a menace like Chloe."

"I'll manage." Chat didn't dare mention his undeveloped plan to delete the evidence. Couldn't have Chloe catching on. He was a cautious cat on a hot tin roof.

Ladybug rested a hesitant hand on his shoulder, a quiet consolation. He appreciated the gesture, and he suddenly reached over and wrapped his partner into a hug, burying his face into her shoulder. She didn't protest, and let him hold her for strength in his predicament. He loved that about her. Even when she dismissed his flirtatious advances, she knew when he just needed a strong pillar of strength. They remained that way for several long minutes until he finally pulled away, recharged and ready to fight back.

He smiled at her, and she smiled back. "I'm not going to just stand by and let you do this on your own," Ladybug said, determined. "You're my partner, and we take care of each other."

"But it's my secret…"

"You'd do the same if my identity was in danger, and you know it. So let me help you."

Chat knew she was right. This situation was much more precarious than Lady Wifi, and Chloe wasn't even akumatized; her memory wouldn't go away with a wave of Miraculous Cure. "Okay," he said finally. "But wait until I think it's the right moment."

Ladybug trusted him. He trusted Ladybug. "Deal."

When Adrien returned home that night, he found forty-six texts and fourteen missed calls from Chloe.

.o0o.

 **I looked up a giant list of cat-themed idioms, euphemisms, and puns. You have been warned.**

 **This chapter was a bit longer than the previous two, and I hope that the following chapters continue to be this way. I've been trying to convey a slightly rebellious and not-completely-submitted Adrien/Chat Noir here; I just don't think Adrien/Chat Noir would so easily submit to blackmail. So let me know how I did and if it seems too weird or OOC.**

 **Anyway, good luck with those going back to school!**

 **Cheers, 1004-Angel**


	4. Chapter 4

**Thank you everyone for your wonderful feedback. It keeps me going. :)**

 **I've also been thinking about getting a beta reader. I've noticed I seem to be finding more and more typos in my drafts, and I don't have the time I'd like to go through and fix them all. If you or anyone you know is interested or would be a good fit, let me know, I'd appreciate it. :)**

The Story So Far:  
Adrien is officially dating Chloe, much to his distaste. She has told him that Chat Noir is no longer allowed to flirt with Ladybug, and Adrien meanwhile begins to detail his plan to free himself from Chloe's clutches. Chat Noir debates whether or not to tell Ladybug, for fear of causing her worry, but eventually tells her that he has to date Chloe to keep his identity secret. She takes the news with a strange reaction…

Chapter 4

Marinette paced in her room, slowly driving Tikki dizzy. Adrenaline flowed through her veins, and with no akuma to fight and Tikki too tired to transform, the young designer resorted to taking laps around the entire room, going up and down the stairs to her bed, and sitting for barely five seconds before getting up again to repeat the process. Her fingers cupped her chin in anxious thought and simultaneously scratched at her head as if the action would somehow make everything come together.

 _We were just taking our time before class. See, we're dating now._

 _If I don't want Chloe releasing my identity video, I have to date her._

That's what they had said. Chloe and Chat Noir. Except it hadn't been her black-clad partner on the bratty girl's arm that morning. It had been Adrien Agreste.

 _I have to date her._

 _We're dating now._

 _Chloe's telling the truth._

"ARUGH," Marinette screeched, finally coming to a stop in the center of the room and scaring poor Tikki. "Adrien _can't_ be Chat Noir, he just _can't_ but he _is_ and I can't find any way to disprove it and it just can't be a coincidence _oh my god_ he's been hitting on me for forever! What does that mean!? _Adrien's in love with Ladybug,_ that's what it means! I should be overjoyed but…"

"But…" Tikki prompted, coming to float in front of her girl's anxious face.

Marinette's hands dropped to her sides. "I don't know what to think, Tikki," she whimpered. "This whole thing is nuts. Adrien likes me, but he likes the _other me._ And I like the _other him…_ so does that mean I've been in love with Chat Noir this whole time?"

"I'm not sure," the kwami admitted, holding a tiny hand to Marinette's cheek. "But we do know that he's in trouble and needs our help."

"Marinette's, or Ladybug's?"

"Both," Tikki said firmly, ever Marinette's pillar of strength. "Right now, we need to be careful. Anything could set Chloe off and make her release the video."

Marinette steeled her emotions. "You're right, Tikki. Adrien or not, I'm not going to let Chat Noir deal with this on his own. We need a plan."

"What do you have in mind?"

"I said we _need_ a plan, not that I have one."

Tikki seemed to ponder something. "Are you going to tell him that you figured him out?"

Marinette swallowed a lump in her throat. No, she couldn't possibly do that. He had enough on his plate as it was, being paraded around as Chloe's boyfriend, which was bad enough in and of itself, on top of the pressing anxiety of his impending catastrophe, every second aware that he could rub the glamourpuss's fur the wrong way. She couldn't possibly reveal to him now that not only had he unintentionally outed himself to Chloe, but to Ladybug as well. There was no way she was going to let it weigh on his mind that she knew who he was, a fact she would rather not know, and he didn't know who she was, the one thing he wanted most.

Tikki seemed to understand her girl's turmoil, and interpreted her silence as a negative. "We'll figure something out," the kwami comforted.

At that moment, Marinette's phone buzzed loudly against the wood of her desk. The designer eased her rapidly beating heart and collected the device, finding a message from Alya.

[Girl, you won't believe this.]

"Ten bucks says it's about Adrien," Marinette mumbled, typing out a reply.

 **[What won't I believe?]**

A pause, then the phone began to ring, Alya having forgone texting in preference for a voice call.

"Hello?"

"GIRL," Alya's voice was loud in Marinette's ear. "I can't type it out right now. I just got a text from Nino who just got a text from Adrien that he's taking Chloe on a date to the amusement park this Saturday. We have to go and follow them!"

"WHAT?" Marinette screeched, then quickly regained control and cast a nervous look at her bedroom door. "When?"

"They're meeting outside the gate at ten am," Alya reported. "We're meeting Nino at nine just in case."

Marinette chewed her lip. It was tempting. Follow Adrien and Chloe on a date, figure out how to rescue him from the Queen Bee's clutches. But she didn't know if she would be able to even look her crush… partner… ugh, _Adrien_ in the face without immediately seeing Chat Noir. Marinette wasn't sure if she was mentally prepared to see the humble boy who sat in front of her, dress him up in black, and see the flirty and confident cat.

"Why Nino?"

"Cause Adrien's his best friend, he's not going to let Adrien destroy himself by dating Chloe." Alya's voice grew firmer. "And neither are we. Chloe doesn't deserve him, _you_ do. And I'm going to make him see just how _amazing_ you are so he'll dump Chloe's sorry as—"

"I got it, I got it," Marinette quickly interrupted. If this conversation continued, she was afraid that she might let something slip regarding her latest discovery, and Alya would latch onto that like a vice and then they'd all be doomed. "I'll come."

"Great! Wear something inconspicuous."

Marinette hung up with a heavy weight on her chest.

Saturday came sooner than Marinette could anticipate. All through the week, she struggled to keep her eyes from wandering to Adrien, who now sat across the aisle by the windows, almost out of her line of sight. Even so, she could see how visibly uncomfortable Adrien was no matter how much he tried to hide it, and it made her angrier with every passing day. She wasn't sure if the other classmates could also detect Adrien's distress, but if they did they didn't mention it. Marinette was constantly called out by her teachers for not paying attention, but the designer couldn't care less. She could only see her trusted friend and partner in every movement, every shift, every twitch that Adrien made, and the poor girl didn't know how to cope.

So by the time Saturday rolled around, Marinette was stewing. She bid her parents an early goodbye and met Alya and Nino outside the park entrance at nine like they had agreed. The DJ and reporter both sported dark-colored clothing and baseball caps. Alya had her hair pulled into a ponytail and her eyes obscured by oversized sunglasses, while Nino opted for Ray Bans. Marinette was dressed more naturally, forgoing her usual attire for a light purple T-shirt and black jacket, denim shorts and comfortable tennis shoes. She had also pulled her hair into a ponytail under a baseball cap. Tikki was safely tucked into her jacket pocket.

Marinette, Alya, and Nino exchanged determined glances.

"What's the plan?" Alya asked Nino.

The DJ stared at her. "My plan was to follow your plan?"

"You mean you don't have a plan!? This was _your_ idea!"

"Guys, Adrien's here!"

Marinette shushed her friends, and they ducked behind a sign displaying ticket prices. Adrien's limo had pulled up to the curb, the blonde stepping out of it with a lackadaisical expression on his face. A cold hand gripped Marinette's heart, knowing that he had no choice but to bring Chloe here. One part of her mind imagined herself on his arm as they walked through the front gate, laughing. Then Adrien melted away into Chat Noir, kneeling down to give her hand a kiss and glancing up at her through his green eyes. Marinette visibly shuddered, still not completely used to the idea of her crush and the flirty cat-boy being one and the same.

Adrien had made himself comfortable on a concrete wall, fiddling absentmindedly with his phone. Chloe arrived at ten thirty, an epitome of "fashionably late." The blackmailer wore white capris and a lace cardigan over a piercing yellow tank top that plunged dangerously across her chest. Uncomfortable looking flats adorned her feet, and Marinette's fashion-oriented eyes burned at the combination. Chloe had her hair pulled into its usual ponytail, sunglasses making her eyes seem twice as large.

"Adri-kins!" Chloe squealed when she caught sight of her prey, gravitating towards him with a look on her face that Marinette hated.

"Hey, Chloe," the boy greeted her, dully but politely.

"I want to go in the Haunted Mystery Tour first!" Chloe latched onto Adrien's arm, pressing herself so close to him it was almost as if she wanted to meld the two together permanently.

The two headed into the park, Marinette, Alya, and Nino trailing behind. To any unsuspecting eyes, Chloe and Adrien appeared to be any normal couple. They stood in lines, ate lunch together, and talked. Well, Chloe did most of the talking. Although she hated to admit it, Marinette would give Chloe a little credit for not being on her phone the entire time and actively tried to engage her uncooperative date.

And Marinette started to have fun, too. Though their main objective was observation, it meant that she and her to compatriots had to stand in line with the object of their investigation, albeit a few people behind or so. And though Marinette's heart clenched every time Chloe leaned in too close for her, and Adrien's, comfort, she eventually concluded that, after all, this was Chat Noir (god, she still wasn't used to that). Her partner could handle himself, and she had faith in him. What kind of faith, Marinette wasn't sure, but she knew that Chat Noir wouldn't give in easily to blackmail.

Nino and Alya sat together on a bench, each holding their stomachs and regretting their decision to eat before riding the Twisting Cyclone of Death. Nino even looked a little green. Marinette pulled her ball cap tighter across her forehead, peeking out from where she had hidden out behind a bush.

Adrien and Chloe moved away from the crowd of people. Or rather, Chloe dragged him, an annoyed expression on his face that didn't suit his handsome features. Marinette cast anxious glances between them and Alya and Nino, whose attentions were momentarily distracted from stomachaches by a street juggler and his flaming knives act. She didn't want to ditch her two friends, but she also couldn't afford to lose Adrien in the crowd. The decision weighed heavily on her conscious before she grit her teeth and bid a pained apology to her journalist friend.

An empty bathroom and a flash of red light later, Ladybug crawled through a window with the silent vow never to use public toilets again. From a well-disguised position on the roof, she could easily catch Chloe's bright blonde hair through the crowd, a reluctant Adrien trailing behind her. Ladybug watched from around a corner, staring intensely as she saw Chloe drag Adrien behind the sign that pointed in the direction of the next roller coaster, still there but practically invisible to anyone who wasn't looking for them. Unfortunately for Chloe, she had an angry Miraculous superhero on her tail with a frightening inclination for the wellbeing of her partner and friend.

Ladybug ran along a rooftop to get closer, lying flat on her stomach with her eyes just barely raised over the edge of the nearest building, happening to be an ice cream stand, to get a better look. What she saw made her grip the roof so hard; her Miraculous-strengthened fingers nearly cracked the tile.

Chloe had pulled Adrien as close to her body as she could, arms wrapped affectionately around the back of his neck and her eyes half-lidded in a seductive pose. She pressed her body closely against him, effectively backing him against the sign and thereby preventing any means of escape. Adrien looked incredibly uncomfortable with his situation, hands raised away from her body and his face tilted away from hers, eyes looking everywhere but his "girlfriend."

"Kiss me," Chloe demanded, rising on her tiptoes to be at eye level with him, purposefully pressing her breasts even further into his chest. Although a light flush colored his cheeks, Adrien showed no other sign that he was okay with Chloe's advancement, and that angered Ladybug even further. It was never okay to force yourself onto someone else when that someone was visibly uncomfortable. Never in Ladybug's career had she wished an akuma would appear until now.

Chloe wasn't happy with Adrien's avoidance, her expression darkening slightly as she put one hand against his cheek and forced him to look at her. "Kiss me, Adrien," she demanded again. "This is a romantic date, and you should have kissed me by now."

"But I don't want to."

"Kissing is part of a boyfriend and girlfriend relationship," Chloe said, her voice taking on a cheerfully threatening tone. "Do I need to remind you what happens if you don't do your part?"

Ladybug heard a small crack, and glanced down to see that she had actually gripped the tile with such force, a thin line had appeared in the dark green material. She had to put a stop to this. There was no way she was going to let her precious Adrien – _her Chat Noir –_ go through this alone.

She could sense Tikki's protest, but she had to do something. As quietly as she could manage, Ladybug summoned her Lucky Charm. She held it tightly against her body to mask the bright light as much as possible, but she still drew some bystander's curious eyes. The hero quickly slid off the roof and cowered behind bushes, and the park goers moved on, probably disregarding it as a trick of the light.

Ladybug let out a breath and looked around, relieved she could still see and hear her two targets' conversation. Looking down, she realized her Lucky Charm had manifested into a large fluffy polka-dotted feather pillow.

Her first thought was to throw it at them as it was. But that wouldn't do much other than piss Chloe off and give Adrien a –

Ladybug's mouth dropped, her eyes shooting up as Adrien's form suddenly flashed a red and black polka-dotted pattern, along with her yo-yo and the pillow. She knew immediately what she had to do, and she already felt sick to her stomach at the idea of using her crush's weakness against him.

"Sorry, Adrien," Ladybug whispered, hoping the message would be well received.

Chloe was beginning to lean forward, both her hands now holding Adrien's face in place. Her eyes were shut gently, bright red lipstick puckered as she closed the distance between their lips. Adrien's face was screwed up in protest, eyes squeezed tightly and lips pulled back into a grimace, hands clenched tightly at his sides. The sight angered Ladybug even further, and she hoped Adrien would understand.

With a shout, Ladybug threw the pillow into the air, waiting until it was directly over the couple's heads before winding up her yo-yo and launching it. The yo-yo landed a direct hit on the pillow with a _thump,_ releasing a flurry of feathers into the air, swirling around Chloe and Adrien light giant snowflakes.

As feathers graced the boy's cheeks, Adrien's eyes snapped open, a knowing expression dawning on his face. Chloe barely knew what hit her when Adrien suddenly let out a thundering sneeze… directly into her face.

Chloe let out a screech that put horror film protagonists to shame. Her tantrum drew the attention of security, calling in a disturbance on their coms as they made their way towards the screaming girl. Her hands trembled in midair as Adrien pulled himself from her grasp, struggling to keep his relieved expression under wraps between sneezes.

"Sorry, Chloe," Adrien mumbled through a stuffy nose, not sounding sorry at all. Ladybug hated that she'd had to induce his allergy like that, but it seemed like the only way to break up a terrifying scene. He'd forgive her later. She hoped.

"Ma'am, I'm going to need to ask you to cease your screaming," one of the security officers said as he approached with his partner.

"He sneezed in my _face!"_ Chloe screeched. "Do you have _any_ idea how long it took to get this makeup done!?"

The officer's partner glanced at Adrien, standing off to one side and rubbing his nose. "Sorry, officer," he said apologetically. "I'm allergic to feathers, and some birds must have flown overhead or something…"

None of them noticed the empty pillowcase draped across the sign above them.

Ladybug's earrings beeped, and she took off before anyone else could spot her. Once she'd transformed again, Marinette hustled to a pastry stall and stuffed a couple chocolate chip cookies into her purse. Tikki wasn't very happy that Marinette had used her Lucky Charm to break up a Chloe and Adrien kiss _again,_ but the kwami understood how much it meant to the designer to keep her partner safe from gold-digging blackmailing girlfriends.

"Where'd you go, girl?" Alya asked once Marinette rejoined them. "The juggler act was over a couple minutes ago."

"Sorry, had to run to the bathroom," Marinette apologized quickly, smiling to ease the tension.

"Mari, we actually, uh…" Nino rubbed the back of his neck. "We actually kind of lost Adrien and Chloe…"

Marinette breathed heavily, pretending to be frustrated. "What were you doing!?"

Alya and Nino exchanged apologetic looks. Marinette couldn't force herself to stay mad at them for long, however, and hung her head. "I'm sorry," she mumbled. "Let's just go find them, okay?"

"No need, they're over there."

Alya's expert eyes spotted the duo being escorted in the direction of the security building by two blue-clad security officials. Chloe was still ranting and raving, the main object of the older men's focus. Adrien walked a little ways behind, looking sheepish and slightly apologetic, but Marinette could see the relieved flashes behind his eyes.

"Why are they being led away by security?" Nino asked as the three slinked closer.

"Probably something Chloe did," Alya reasoned.

 _You have no idea,_ Marinette thought.

Adrien and Chloe were released from security quickly, the girl mostly likely playing the "Do you know who I am!?" card. They departed the amusement park soon after, Adrien still suffering the lingering dregs of allergy and Chloe insisting on a shower. Marinette, Alya, and Nino split up soon after with mutual packs affirmations of success (with Marinette patting herself extra hard on the back for her expert pillow-throwing).

Marinette remained awake for well into the night, staring at the dark ceiling above her, lost in a dark swirl of rampant emotions as she drifted into a restless sleep.

 **Help with last moments of chapter from local asshole who is looking over my shoulder as I write this acknowledgement.**

 **Again, if you or someone you know would be a good beta, please leave it in a review or a PM!**

 **Reviews welcome, appreciated, and reciprocated!**

 **Cheers,**

 **1004-Angel**


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